After the home school convention

Isn't life a mumble-jumble of emotions? When I came home from the convention, I was all excited to tell you about it and to post these 2 videos. The first is of our friends, the Geiger family, and the second is of our friends, the Bartlett family. Both families played offertories during the convention--both filled the hall with peaceful, soothing music that nourished the soul. I know that anyone who listens to the videos will also be blessed to hear these young people's music so I suggest that you take the time to enjoy their gifts and beautiful hearts before you read further. I'm sorry for the quality of the videos but I really want you to hear them even though they're hardly professional. :)

Immediately upon our return home from the convention, trouble began. As I wrote earlier, we had record snow fall this winter. Well, it began raining which began melting the snow. All of the culverts were full of snow and with the ground still being frozen, there was no place for all of the melting snow and rain to go but over the roads. When Tamera came to pick up her daughter's birthday cake on Sunday afternoon, 2 roads were already under water between them and us and they live a mile and a half away.

The rain continued to melt the huge snowfall and gravel roads began to wash. The highway to Hazelton was covered with water, cutting off travel to the west. The more snow and rain that filled the riverbeds, the more dangerous travel became in our area. Feeding cattle with the old tractor became almost imposable and Robert pondered going west to get the 9030 which is over in the field south of Hazelton. Earlier we had needed it over there as the 1486 wasn't able to dig the bales out of the snowbanks, but now we need it over here.

My womanly intuition warned that Robert shouldn't take the gravel road as the bridge on the road to Braddock is old and possably not safe. He checked with the people at Titan in Kintyre as one of their staff lives in Braddock. They said that the road between here and Braddock was underwater in 2 places so our hope of fetching the 9030 home to help with feeding died. We praise the Lord that He sent cooler temps today to freeze up the slop and now feeding with the 1486 is much more doable. Late yesterday we heard that the highway to Hazelton is now accessible so I'm sure that one of the guys will make the 35 mile trip soon to bring home their favorite tractor. Of course that means that it won't be over there to load the remaining bales but such is life on the farm. Hopefully things will dry off sometime before we need those bales as we just bought some hay from down south.

Anyway, for the past 3 days here we have had rain, melting snow, a poor tractor, and yesterday a blizzard on top of the rain. In the driving wind and snow, we had to move calves around between the barns in an attempt to simplify chores and get them more room to prevent crowding. Two calves were dead last night from all of the stress and spirits around here are about as low as they were high at the convention. ):

To make matters worse, Linton is flooding. Folks we know are loosing their homes and others up by Hazen left when the water reached the second story of their house. Yesterday afternoon people along the Missouri in Bismarck started being evacuated and this morning parts of the trailer park where we lived up there was abandoned. Come to think of it, I wonder why I am sitting here writing about this as I'm sure that nobody will read it anyway. Still, when it is all over, someone may be glad that the events were recorded.

So, I've been debating about calling this post, "Misery," but who would read it then? It's not my goal to depress people but still, sometimes life is depressing isn't it. Which brings me to my favorite workshop at the convention. It was called, "Dealing with depression." Jacob and I went together and it was an incredible workshop--I'm so glad that we attended it. Now I can see that he deals with depression just as his mama does. It felt so good to just admit to myself that I have a problem with depression.

The workshop had lots of good tips on dealing with this problem and one of them was to TALK ABOUT IT. Do you know that I may not have had the courage to write this if the workshop speaker hadn't said that one of the worst things to do when you are depressed is to keep it to yourself. So there, I admit that I have dealt with depression and suicidal thoughts all of my life. I praise God that He was right here beside me every time I put my finger on the trigger; or mixed up some poison, or turned on the exhaust in the closed garage; or pondered taking a bottle of pills. I praise God that He loved me enough to stop me from attempting, in my selfish way, to "End all of the pain." I praise God that He is pro-life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So if suicide is not an option and life becomes down-right miserable at times, what can a person do to cope? Well, like I've already said, talking about this problem as freely as if it were a broken leg, is a big part of getting the support a person needs during depressing times. Another thing that the woman shared at the convention has to do with Scripture. When a person believes a lie of the enemy, for instance, that they have no worth, they get depressed. If a person just accepts this as a possibility, their depression grows and soon they see that it is true that they have no worth. This feeds the depression and soon suicide seems like a logical conclusion to such a worthless life.

The Scriptures tell the truth which ends this vicious cycle. The Scriptures say that God loves EVERY person so much that He sent His only son to die on the cross for EVERYBODY--that includes me. When she shared some of the passages that prove God's love for all people, my spirits lifted right then and there. Jacob and I smiled at each other and our depression lifted. GOD'S WORD DOES NOT LIE--GOD LOVES ALL PEOPLE THE SAME--GOD DOES NOT WANT ANYONE TO DOUBT HIS LOVE FOR THEM!!!

The last thought I have is something that our family learned about years ago while reading the book, Pollyanna. The movie is good too but the book is better. Little Pollyanna knew, from her father's teaching, that by looking for something good in EVERY situation, she would find something to be grateful for. When something upsets me now, it is a sure cure to find what is good in the situation and focus on it. The Complete Jewish Bible puts it this way in James 1:2-4, "Regard it all as joy, my brothers, when you face various kinds of temptations:for you know that the testing of your trust produces perseverance. But let perseverance do its complete work; so that you may be complete, lacking in nothing."

I have noticed this past few nights, during family prayer time, that many prayers of gratitude have been lifted up. "Thanks for a nice warm house, Lord." "Thanks for the barns for the animals to get out of the storm, Lord." "Thanks for all of the good food that you gave us today, Lord." "Thanks for the 9030, Lord" and then an amendment, "I wish that it was here." :)

Oh that we would learn to be grateful for all things that the Lord sends our way for we know that all things work together for good to those who love the Lord................

Before the Home school convention

This must be short as I have much to do today to prepare for the home school convention. It's one of our highlights each year as it is the only time that we get to see some of our friends who live far away from us. In fact, some of these friends we wouldn't even have if it weren't for the home school convention. Please be in prayer for the fellowship to be sweet and all minds be open to that which the Lord would have us learn this year. I always learn so much and, now that I'm one of the older ladies with some "Success" in the child-rearing department, it's a treat to get to share some things that I've learned with those just getting started.
Anyway, we are going to do our cleaning for Sabbath today, plus make our food for the 2 days that we'll be gone, plus get our clothing "Perfect"; plus relax and de-stress so that we can be nice and calm all during the convention. Actually it'll be pretty wild. Being it's close this year (75 miles away) we all get to go together. The drawback to that is that we'll rise VERY early tomorrow morning; rush through our 2 hours of chores; drive the 75 miles; try to get beautiful on the way; and be there in time for registration at 9:00. We know that it's possible to do so as we've made it to Bismarck by 9:00 when we start rushing around 5:00. The first day isn't so bad but doing it 2 days in a row is QUITE straining on the adrenals. Praise the Lord that I can do a session on the way because I don't have to drive and then there is always cortices.
I just realized that I have never shared how to do cortices, which is sad, because it can relieve so much pain for people. It's the one thing that Dr. Veltheim wants us to share with everyone, free of charge, because he wants the whole world to be free of pain. Being I just sent this to my newest client yesterday, I can copy it quick and be off the computer in time to make lunch. Pretty neat if it will only work--I'm going to try. YEAH--it worked!!!
Well, the first hand position is at the base of the skull. Keep your fingers closed together and tap with the other hand. You must tap on both sides of the head or nothing will happen. You take 2 full breaths for each hand position. The most important thing to remember is the thought. You continually think, "I am linking the 2 sides of my brain." After you have done 2 full breaths on the first hand position, slide your other hand up the head on top of the first hand. The first hand now taps for 2 breath cycles. Rotate like this to cover the whole middle part of the head. The last position is on the sides of the head just above the ears. Hear you put both hands on the sides of the head just briefly to make contact, then take one hand off and tap. Either hand will do.
This may seem silly but it is linking the 2 sides of the brain together so that it can work as a unit as it is intended to do. Stress breaks down the communication between the 2 sides of the brain and pain and illness follow. We, being made in God's image, are meant to be healthy and when the brain can work as a unit and scan the systems of the body, it can repair ANYTHING. Oh yes, you must breath deeply throughout the entire cortices procedure as the deep breathing allows the brain to scan itself and make the necessary connections. It's a good idea to spend a few moments each day to breath VERY deeply to help the brain scan the systems of the body and attempt to re-establish communication lines. If, however, the communication is severely compromised, BodyTalk is necessary to help get the lines rebuilt. It's really awesome what can be done with this very simple technique! I praise the Lord every day for bringing BodyTalk into my life and giving me the hope of a REALLY healthy body. :)
So I must close but I pray that some of you who read this will give cortices a try. If you have any questions, please feel free to write. When I first took Access and learned how to do cortices, I did it 12-15 times a day as the pain was so great. Within half an hour the pain was gone but it returned quickly. I learned quickly that I'd rather do cortices than take a pain killer as it worked much better and cost nothing. Gradually I was able to reduce the number of times a day that I needed cortices but it's still the first thing that I do every day--after I greet the Lord of course. On stressful days I may still need to do it 5 times a day but that is pretty rare and most of the time I am pain-free. PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PS. I will post some pictures of the convention afterwards but if any of you are pondering home schooling, please join us at the Jamestown Civic Center tomorrow morning at 9:00 SHARP!!! :)

Except for the grace of God

All right, I'll confess that I am a perfectionist. My personality type is STRONGLY melancholy which INSISTS upon perfection. The melancholy is the type of person who gives themselves shingles when they can't make the whole world perfect, including themselves. That is the down side of my personality. The good part is that I took to heart every lesson that my voice teacher, Dianna Moxness, drilled into me during my school years and she made me into a very good singer. My English teachers were just as demanding and they made me into a pretty fair writer. So, as I taught my children their English lessons through the years, I would drill and drill and grill them about what made "Good writing"until perfection was as closely attained as possible.
This led to the habit of having them critique the writing that came into the house through the morning mail. Whether the newspaper or magazine articles or penpal's letters--all were fair game. It has made them better writers, to be sure. This morning, however, the Lord has shown me the down side of this particular twist of my melancholy disposition. To put it bluntly, how would you like to have your friendly letter to your penpal critiqued down to every last comma? I've even thought of myself as the "Comma queen" at times. ):
Well, as I was going over the mail this morning, the Lord showed me how very uncharitable this habit has become. I was pricked in my heart to repent and now I must write and share my experience with this "Better than thou" aspect of my personality. When I could see what I was doing, I was ashamed that I have been teaching my children to be critical of their friends in this way. So I asked the Lord what I could do about this habit that I have taught my children. He reminded me of Pastor Bill whom we haven't seen in over a decade. Still, Pastor Bill was such an unforgettable example of love and compassion that his words live on in my heart. I am taking the time to share this with you now because I feel that perhaps his words are needed today in more hearts than just mine?
Pastor Bill was an incredible man of God and Robert and I were both so blessed to have him teach our young couple's Sunday School class when we were still Sunday keepers. He was the "Perfect" choice to influence young couples, who were bearing and raising their children. I can recall him saying that he prayed every day for us ladies who were pregnant in his class. At one point there were 4 of us and a joke circulated that the other ladies needed to be careful where they sat. :) Seriously, it was so wonderful knowing that Pastor Bill was praying for me every day that I bore Andrew in my womb. I'm sure that he didn't stop after the birth either. :)
Anyway, we were talking about pride one day with Pastor Bill and he shared something with us that I should apparently pull out and ponder more often than I have been. He said that whenever he felt tempted to elevate himself above someone else (which he certainly could have been tempted to do with his fine character), he told himself something which put things in the right perspective.
I can still see his wise eyes shining as he shared this gem of truth with us from his life experiences. Pastor Bill said, "Any time that I think I'm better than someone else, I look at that person and think, 'Except for the grace of God, THERE GO I."
WOW--except for God's grace in my life, forgiving me of all my pride and other foolishness, I would be JUST LIKE THAT PERSON I AM DESPISING RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!
My mind just went back to a Scripture passage that God used to say the same thing 20 years ago when I was beginning my recovery work from incest. I was in a Bible study with women and this passage was being discussed. Ephesians 2:1-3 and I'll write the whole thing so that you don't have to look it up. "And you hath He quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins. Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience. Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.
After the Bible study had ended and I was alone, I pondered that passage. It cut through my pride like nothing I'd ever read. I got so angry with God that I pounded my fist on the table and demanded from Him, "Do you mean to tell me that you view me just as my brothers?" It was one of the times that I heard the audible voice of God. He said, "Why are you pounding your fist on the table Dawn? Why is your face red with anger? Could it be that you ARE a child of wrath just as the others--just as your brothers?"
I got so furious to think that God didn't know the difference between my anger at their abuse and their anger which caused the abuse. I went to my bedroom and raged at God, "How can you say that to me when I have served you all of my life?"
Very calmly He answered, "Are you a child of wrath, Dawn, just as the others?"
Then I could see that I was full of wrath and the love of God made it very clear to me that I was NOT any different than those whom I was hating. Repentance was sweet that day and it was the real beginning of my recovery from all of the abuse I suffered in my childhood home.
So, as I ponder all that I've written just now, while Cora's lovely piano music fills the house, I see that the Father has continually been chipping away at all of the things that I used to think I needed to "Survive." Truthfully, HE IS ALL THAT I HAVE EVER NEEDED AND HIS LOVE IS SWEETER THAN ANY VENGEANCE EVER COULD BE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Truthfully, it is sweet to be able to remind myself this morning that, "Except for the grace of God, there go I--a child of wrath just as the others," or maybe just a "Poor" writer. :)

Cora is 22 years old

On the morning of March 7th, which is Cora's birthday, the first thing that Robert said to me was, "Happy anniversary." I was still half asleep, but I did know that it wasn't our anniversary, so I jerked my brain awake and asked, "What on earth do you mean?"

"Well," he said, "it's your 22nd anniversary from the day that you became a mother." I smiled a big smile and let my memory take me back 22 years to the day when Cora Beth Bornemann joined the world and our family. I had never known such joy as holding my own flesh and blood in my arms. It still gives me a thrill to think of myself as a mother. This picture was taken at Cora's birthday party. As you can see, I STILL love holding a baby whenever I get the chance.
This is the 4th child of our neighbor's who attended Cora's birthday party.






I recall now a day, about 2 weeks before the birth, when I was in Aberdeen buying some supplies for "The baby." The clerk smiled as I came through her line and asked, "Your first child?" I said, "How did you know?" She said, "Because you're so happy that you're glowing." We had talked about motherhood, as she ran up my bill, and I felt so special. You see, I had never really felt like I belonged in any category of people. I was the only girl in my family; I was the only granddaughter; I was the only one in my family to graduate from collage......... However, when the clerk pointed out to me that soon I would be in a group of people called MOTHERS, somehow I was no longer alone. I LOVED IT!!!!!!!!! and I still do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!







Well, Cora's birthday was phenomenal. Our neighbor, Stacey, brought over her children whom Cora babysat for and it was wild around here. The children brought Cora a matchbox car and a cardboard book about babies. Stacey said that they had wrapped up other presents also but, when the markers had disappeared and she pointed out that they were wrapped up for Cora's birthday, it was decided that Cora didn't like markers after all and they were promptly unwrapped again. :)







Cora's brothers had made her a flower press out of some oak wood and had done wood burning on it so that was really awesome. I so love when people pour themselves into a gift for a loved one! I had taken Cora to pick out a new bed-in-a-bag last month so now her bedroom looks fresh and new. I also had ordered THE COMPLETE JEWISH BIBLE for Cora to study out of as her old King James is coming apart at the seams. I so love to read my Jewish Bible as the Hebrew name for Jesus, Yeshua, is used throughout. Also the Hebrew names are used for people and cities. It also puts things into context as Yeshua was Jewish and I know very little of the culture or the traditions of the Jewish people. I have learned much by realizing that God wasn't writing to Americans living in the 21st century. He wrote things to his Jewish disciples living in the first century. Many things are more clearly understood by realizing this.

Anyway, back to Cora's birthday. The main surprise for her was that her papa had decided to give Cora a new laptop for her birthday. I'll need Andrew to show me AGAIN how to attach the video as I'd like you to see her as she realized that it "Really is it? To put it mildly, Cora was pleasantly shocked with the gift. We all laughed because she shared that she was trying to figure out what would take some assembly as the boys spent the afternoon in their room, on the day of it's arival, getting it "Ready" for their sister. She had guessed that it was either a hoop skirt or a quilting frame. Sorry to disappoint you, dear Cora. :)




So it was a great day. I got overwhelmed at one point with the decibel level in here and excused myself to do cortices on my overstimulated brain. I did my best not to let my mother dampen my enthusiasm. I rebelled only once when she tried to guilt me into doing my "Family duty." I told her that I felt no duty to people who didn't care whether I lived or died in '06. When she said, "When are you ever going to get over that?" I, with a voice just a wee bit icy said, "We'll see what you think about it when you're on YOUR deathbed." End of subject. Cora had a fantastic birthday, so that's what matters the most.


Today was great for me as I have a new client who happens to be an old friend from Bismarck. She is REALLY intune with her body and LOVED BodyTalk. She had a great session and is planning to come to the BT clinic day in April in Bismarck. I wish I could put into words the thrill that I get when I do a session on someone and it "Makes sense" to them. When they're stressed at the mere mention of someone's name or a place or a time and, after I've balanced them to it, I can literally see the tension disappear. It is such a thrill as I ponder being able to help people diminish their stress levels!!!!! I think almost constantly about keeping my stress levels down as I recall the stress I felt as I gave myself shingles in '06. How I wish I had known then what I know now about lessening stress through BodyTalk. But then, I suppose I'd not have opened my mind to BT had I not suffered so. The hardest thing to open, you know, is a closed mind.

The hardest part for me at Cora's party was when I shared with mom how I had offered to help someone we know who got drug by his horses and has major wounds and a few broken bones. She put her arm around my shoulder and said, "Well Dawn, you did your part. You can't make people accept your help if they don't want it." The hypocrisy almost took my breath away. Who do I want to help to come to peace with themselves more than my parents? Why is it that she can see that as it applies to others and not to herself? This is a great mystery to me. Robert said that the answer to that question is a great big thing called DENIAL. Sure, denial can keep us alive during times of distress but to continue in this way your whole life is to cut yourself off from the very help you so desparately need. The Bible puts it this way, "The rich get richer and the poor get poorer." How frustrating it is to care so deeply for people who refuse to be helped!!!!! OH HELP ME TO KNOW HOW TO JUST LET THEM GO, DEAR LORD!!!

"Links to Healing"

Time keeps slipping away so quickly and I just want to grab it and stuff it in a bag and say, "Stay put, you nasty time." I've been wanting to write for days about how I came up with the name for my business. It's a long detailed story but, again I should be making supper. So I'll just say that, after months of pondering, I finally knew the name for my BodyTalk business is to be "Links to Healing." That was last week and I ordered myself some free business cards so they should be here by the time of the BT clinic in Bismarck
That day is April 5th and anyone can show up for free BodyTalk sessions and education. I am getting excited about working with the other ladies as a team to make this a success. I will write more details later as the men are coming in for supper.
Tomorrow I'm heading for Bismarck, weather permitting, to see a client up there who is very ill. Also I have my session with Elizabeth and practice with the BodyTalkers is tomorrow night. We're practicing on how to do short, powerful sessions in preparation for the clinic. Our biggest problem seems to be how to explain to the client what came up in the session. We're never sure if we're saying too much or too little. God bless Elizabeth Hanson for all of her willingness to help all of us rookies. :)