After the home school convention

Isn't life a mumble-jumble of emotions? When I came home from the convention, I was all excited to tell you about it and to post these 2 videos. The first is of our friends, the Geiger family, and the second is of our friends, the Bartlett family. Both families played offertories during the convention--both filled the hall with peaceful, soothing music that nourished the soul. I know that anyone who listens to the videos will also be blessed to hear these young people's music so I suggest that you take the time to enjoy their gifts and beautiful hearts before you read further. I'm sorry for the quality of the videos but I really want you to hear them even though they're hardly professional. :)

Immediately upon our return home from the convention, trouble began. As I wrote earlier, we had record snow fall this winter. Well, it began raining which began melting the snow. All of the culverts were full of snow and with the ground still being frozen, there was no place for all of the melting snow and rain to go but over the roads. When Tamera came to pick up her daughter's birthday cake on Sunday afternoon, 2 roads were already under water between them and us and they live a mile and a half away.

The rain continued to melt the huge snowfall and gravel roads began to wash. The highway to Hazelton was covered with water, cutting off travel to the west. The more snow and rain that filled the riverbeds, the more dangerous travel became in our area. Feeding cattle with the old tractor became almost imposable and Robert pondered going west to get the 9030 which is over in the field south of Hazelton. Earlier we had needed it over there as the 1486 wasn't able to dig the bales out of the snowbanks, but now we need it over here.

My womanly intuition warned that Robert shouldn't take the gravel road as the bridge on the road to Braddock is old and possably not safe. He checked with the people at Titan in Kintyre as one of their staff lives in Braddock. They said that the road between here and Braddock was underwater in 2 places so our hope of fetching the 9030 home to help with feeding died. We praise the Lord that He sent cooler temps today to freeze up the slop and now feeding with the 1486 is much more doable. Late yesterday we heard that the highway to Hazelton is now accessible so I'm sure that one of the guys will make the 35 mile trip soon to bring home their favorite tractor. Of course that means that it won't be over there to load the remaining bales but such is life on the farm. Hopefully things will dry off sometime before we need those bales as we just bought some hay from down south.

Anyway, for the past 3 days here we have had rain, melting snow, a poor tractor, and yesterday a blizzard on top of the rain. In the driving wind and snow, we had to move calves around between the barns in an attempt to simplify chores and get them more room to prevent crowding. Two calves were dead last night from all of the stress and spirits around here are about as low as they were high at the convention. ):

To make matters worse, Linton is flooding. Folks we know are loosing their homes and others up by Hazen left when the water reached the second story of their house. Yesterday afternoon people along the Missouri in Bismarck started being evacuated and this morning parts of the trailer park where we lived up there was abandoned. Come to think of it, I wonder why I am sitting here writing about this as I'm sure that nobody will read it anyway. Still, when it is all over, someone may be glad that the events were recorded.

So, I've been debating about calling this post, "Misery," but who would read it then? It's not my goal to depress people but still, sometimes life is depressing isn't it. Which brings me to my favorite workshop at the convention. It was called, "Dealing with depression." Jacob and I went together and it was an incredible workshop--I'm so glad that we attended it. Now I can see that he deals with depression just as his mama does. It felt so good to just admit to myself that I have a problem with depression.

The workshop had lots of good tips on dealing with this problem and one of them was to TALK ABOUT IT. Do you know that I may not have had the courage to write this if the workshop speaker hadn't said that one of the worst things to do when you are depressed is to keep it to yourself. So there, I admit that I have dealt with depression and suicidal thoughts all of my life. I praise God that He was right here beside me every time I put my finger on the trigger; or mixed up some poison, or turned on the exhaust in the closed garage; or pondered taking a bottle of pills. I praise God that He loved me enough to stop me from attempting, in my selfish way, to "End all of the pain." I praise God that He is pro-life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So if suicide is not an option and life becomes down-right miserable at times, what can a person do to cope? Well, like I've already said, talking about this problem as freely as if it were a broken leg, is a big part of getting the support a person needs during depressing times. Another thing that the woman shared at the convention has to do with Scripture. When a person believes a lie of the enemy, for instance, that they have no worth, they get depressed. If a person just accepts this as a possibility, their depression grows and soon they see that it is true that they have no worth. This feeds the depression and soon suicide seems like a logical conclusion to such a worthless life.

The Scriptures tell the truth which ends this vicious cycle. The Scriptures say that God loves EVERY person so much that He sent His only son to die on the cross for EVERYBODY--that includes me. When she shared some of the passages that prove God's love for all people, my spirits lifted right then and there. Jacob and I smiled at each other and our depression lifted. GOD'S WORD DOES NOT LIE--GOD LOVES ALL PEOPLE THE SAME--GOD DOES NOT WANT ANYONE TO DOUBT HIS LOVE FOR THEM!!!

The last thought I have is something that our family learned about years ago while reading the book, Pollyanna. The movie is good too but the book is better. Little Pollyanna knew, from her father's teaching, that by looking for something good in EVERY situation, she would find something to be grateful for. When something upsets me now, it is a sure cure to find what is good in the situation and focus on it. The Complete Jewish Bible puts it this way in James 1:2-4, "Regard it all as joy, my brothers, when you face various kinds of temptations:for you know that the testing of your trust produces perseverance. But let perseverance do its complete work; so that you may be complete, lacking in nothing."

I have noticed this past few nights, during family prayer time, that many prayers of gratitude have been lifted up. "Thanks for a nice warm house, Lord." "Thanks for the barns for the animals to get out of the storm, Lord." "Thanks for all of the good food that you gave us today, Lord." "Thanks for the 9030, Lord" and then an amendment, "I wish that it was here." :)

Oh that we would learn to be grateful for all things that the Lord sends our way for we know that all things work together for good to those who love the Lord................