Share a blessing

I have come to enjoy reading the blog of Bethany Knight who found me a few weeks ago. You can find her blog listed on my sidebar. She is a deep thinker and one who is seeking for peace also.

I grew up in chaos. I never knew what peace was. I never knew that peace was a priority. I can remember when I started my recovery work 20 years ago, my massage therapist said to me, "It sounds as though you like to stir up trouble." I was instantly infuriated. ME--STIR UP TROUBLE. She said, "You're like me. You grew up in so much chaos that you're used to it. When things are peaceful, they're "Boring," so you stir up trouble so that you can maintain the status quo." It was hard to admit, but I could see that she was right. Those were the words that sent me on my search for peace. They sent me straight into the office of an incest counselor which was anything BUT peaceful.

When I look at this pattern that I HAD of stirring up trouble, I can see that it led to my near-death experience. ENOUGH OF THAT!!! I want wellness for myself, so I must work for peace
within myself. I want wellness in my family, so I must work for peace within my family. I want wellness within my community, so I must work for peace within my community. I want wellness within my world, so I must work for peace within my world.

Bethany shared this video on her latest post. I share this with you with the hope that you too will come to see that peace IS the goal. May this pattern of blessing others bring you peace as you begin to receive back that which you put out. This is my prayer for ALL OF THE WORLD!!!

PEACE!

Dawn

Best day

This is the best day that I've had in a loooooooong time. I called the Assisted Living facility in Eureka this morning. The nurse there told me that dad is doing, "Just great." It's been a looong time since I've heard those words in relation to my dad, so I was glad that my friend had prepared me for this possability with her email.

The nurse went on to say that my dad has been doing so well in lots of ways. His walking is more stable; their exercise program is decreasing the pain in his shoulders; he eats well; and is well liked. THIS LAST PART IS THE SHOCK OF THE DECADE.

Then Lettie said, "In fact, we nurses were talking yesterday that Harvey has adjusted to his new home better than ANYBODY WE HAVE EVER SEEN!" How could I resist? I told her that I've been doing BT on dad for several months now. I said that he didn't seem to be doing all that great, even with his sessions, but now that he has a more positive home envioronment, he's taking off. She said that he had just told her that he was going to the bank this morning. WOW--after all of the concern for dad this past year, to think that the worst could be over made this day the best day that I've had in a looooong time.

Then I got a call around supper time that a family needs sessions for their 10 year old son. I just finished that first session and was so encouraged when the mom said, "Wow--that is so neat. Now I want to try it to see what would come up for me!" :) Do you suppose I can find some time to work her in????????????

Just now, though, the day got EVEN sweeter. Robert likes to read at the Organic Consumer's Assocition's site. I noticed the title to this post and just HAD to share it. Ever since hearing Percy Schmiser's story at the organic convention years ago, we've dreamed of the day when Monsanto will have to close it's doors from bankruptcy. I'll have to share that later, but for now I'd like to share this bit of good news from France.

Keep smiling,

Dawn

GMO Giant Monsanto Loses Another Day in Court
By Aaron Turpen Natural News, Oct 29, 2009 Straight to the Source
France's highest court has ruled that Monsanto lied about the safety of its weed killing herbicide Roundup. The decision came just days ago and confirms an earlier court judgment in France finding that Monsanto had falsely advertised Roundup as being "biodegradable" and that it "left the soil clean."The original case was brought to court in 2001 by several French environmental groups alleging that Roundup's main ingredient, glyphosate, has a classification as "dangerous to the environment" by the European Union. That case drug on for years and finally ended in a ruling against Monsanto in 2007. 1The GMO giant quickly appealed and that appeal was heard in 2008 in the Lyon court. Monsanto lost that case as well. They appealed again. This time it went to France's Supreme Court; it lost that hearing and now faces fines and nowhere else to go for further appeals.The court levied a 13,800 Euro fine against the company (about $22,400USD). Monsanto is also looking at continued losses with fourth quarter losses of $233 million (US), mostly due to plummeting sales of the Roundup brand.2 So far, Monsanto has made no public statement about the court`s ruling, but it is also possible that the ruling could mean civil cases from farmers and communities harmed by the false advertising. That could mean millions of dollars more in losses.Roundup is the world's best-selling herbicide and is marketed as a weed-killer to both commercial farmers and home owners. Monsanto is also the world`s largest purveyor of genetically modified seeds (GMO seeds). Often, the seeds are sold in conjunction with Roundup, the seeds being modified to be "herbicide tolerant" (HT-ready).Some have argued that these GM crops and seeds are worse for the environment and could be a real problem. Crop failures of GMO seeds in Africa have highlighted the lack of a crop diversity issue while other studies have found that GM versus non-GM seeds have little or no bearing on higher yields, as seed companies like Monsanto have claimed.
>>> Read the Full Article

OH FOR JOY

Just before supper I received this email from my parent's dear friend from Eureka. I just HAD to share this wonderful news with you and thank every one who has been praying for my dad to be able to move on with his life. OH FOR JOY!!!!!!!!


Just a quick note. I was at church for our Tuesday morning prayer time when I saw that Harvey had some mail in his church mailbox. I pulled it out and took it to him. The church news letter was in there so I thought he would appreciate that.

I found Harvey as good as I have seen him since Erdie died or even before. He had shaven, clean clothes, shared and was so glad that I came to see him. This afternoon he was driving around town. He is so much better and we just praise the Lord for that. He was so alert and was able to carry on a good conversation. He wants to go to church so hopefully the weather will be better so that he can go to church on Sunday. That is a postive sign.

Just knew you needed to know that he is so much better.

Take care and keep in touch

What wonderful news this was and I rejoice--what a weight has been lifted off of me. I was thinking about it at supper when suddenly I started to cry tears of joy. "Oh, I'm just so happy," I said and everyone started laughing. Has anyone else wondered why they start to cry when their joy is at the utmost limits? Any theories?

Well tomorrow I'm heading to Bismarck for my BodyTalk day at my office. The boys are coming along to have a skating party with the Dagley boys and anyone else who will show up from the home school group up there. How absolutely wonderful it is that the weather is so lovely now!!!

Blessings,

Dawn

Technology

I am soooooooooo thankful that Andrew lives with us as I am totally lost when it comes to technology. You see, we've been working on our New Year's letter for a couple of weeks. Well, it just kept getting longer and longer with all of our great pictures that we took for blogging. How could we chose from so many highlights of our year? Well, we chose a LOT of them so thankfully Andrew knew how to get it compressed to send through an email. I thought that those of you who won't be receiving a copy may want to look it over too. I have no idea at all if it will work for you to click here or not, but let's find out. If you'd like to see it and this doesn't work, just send me an email at:savedbybodytalk@gmail.com. I'll send you over a copy. ENJOY!

Dawn for the Bornemanns who all contriuted in some way to this project.


Dear friends,

At long last we have finished our New Year's letter. It's the longest one yet, so you'll want to make sure that you have some time when you dig into it. We are very busy here on the farm and we didn't want to leave anything out. :)

We wish you a wonderful year of God's blessings.

The Bornemanns

Instructions from the resident tech. expert: Due to the large number of photographs included in this years letter, it has become necessary to use a high level of compression to achieve a small file size. Although this may be desirable to reduce the strain on the e-mail system, it has the adverse effect of making the pictures less pleasing to the eye. That said, I have decided to produce two different versions; One being of the smallest possible file size, and the other of a higher graphical quality. Which you choose to download is totally your decision... You will find both of the files available here: Letter Download If you have any problems downloading the letter, just let me know! I can e-mail it directly to you also, if you prefer. Thanks! Andrew B.

HE'S HAPPY!!!!!!!

Note* baby calf pictures just added

I've been meaning to write for a few days to share some WONDERFUL news, but first we got the flue here and then, today, my computer has been out of commission. Seeing now that Andrew's repair job has been successful and hearing that my family is downstairs in the midst of a Foosball tournament (I just woke up from my nap), I decided to take this time to fill you in on our updates and share this news which is a true answer to prayer.

First of all, we had another blizzard. So far that's 2 for this year. I recall last Winter counting up to a dozen, but then I quit counting as it was too depressing. A blizzard, I recall reading from Webster's last Winter, is when you have heavy snow with very strong winds for at least 4 hours. We're VERY thankful for the 9030s as they can make mountains out of 2 foot deep snow everywhere in record time.

The evergreens are beautiful when they're packed full of snow. You can see that our deck snowbank is now almost half way up the doors.
Well, the weather outside is frightful but inside it's so delightful. This is Clara and I together in the milking parlor. I sit on an upside-down 5 gallon pail beside her and do her sessions. A friend asked me the other day why I would waste time doing sessions on a cow when there are so many sick people in the world. "Well," I said, "while I'm waiting for her milk to empty out, I'm not doing anything else anyway." There's another thing too--Clara lets me work on her and she actually gets grumpy if I skip too many days. :) Right now I'm behind with posting her session reports but I do try to give her a session every 2 or 3 days. One of my goals is to have the oldest cow in the world some day. As I fill her life with all sorts of love (Including BodyTalk sessions), I don't see why she doesn't have a fighting chance. :) Isn't my Brown Swiss absolutely beautiful?

This is a closeup of the snow on Clara's back. I can see why she has to be balanced often to Winter.

Cora had a surprise addition to her family this week. Robert went out to feed one 20-degrees- below-zero morning and came back to the milk room with news that one of Cora's cows had calved. We rushed through the rest of chores and headed up to the milk room. The little bull calf was pretty cold. Here I am giving him a BT session while Cora rubbed him vigorously.

We rolled him over so that she could rub the other side too. I worked on the feet and we pulled both heaters as close as possible to the little fellow. All of our efforts paid off when, later in the day, Robert and Cora took him down to the cattle maternity ward in the other section of the goat barn. Mama and baby took to each other like hungry boys take to food and it was a successful match--YIPEE!!! Now Cora has 3 cow-calf pairs in the barn so it is so much fun to watch the babies romping in the straw as we milk the goats. :)

We had a surprise visit from our Keister friends last week. As always, Sarah is a wealth of information as she reads more than anybody that I know. This visit she got us thinking about building a cider press. The speed at which you can process apples has great appeal to me as we didn't get all of our apples put up this year. I never mind giving a few apples to the goats, but they'd be just as happy with the pulp left over from the press. If I can get my dad's apple shoots grafted on to our baby crab apple trees this Spring like I'd like to, we'll need a press even more. Here Sarah and I are pondering God only knows what. :)
And now for my big news. I called my dad on Thursday to see how he's doing. We visited a little bit about the food in his new home and the activities that they do together. I asked him how he's doing and he said, "Pretty good." Then out of the blue he said, "I am so happy that I am in here--at least for the Winter." PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!!!!!! I didn't drag it out of him--he offered this opinion all on his own. HE'S ACTUALLY HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh for joy!!!! I'm thanking all of you who have prayed for his transition to his new home. May the Lord bless you all! Here's a picture of their kitchen in the assisted living facility from the day that we moved him in there.

Well, it looks as though if I want to pop the corn for Sabbath Night at the Movies, I'd best cut this off. You KNOW how much I love popping popcorn. How about if you come over and join us? Who could resist freshly popped corn and a Bonanza re-run? You're all welcome!!!

Waiting for the first kernel to pop,

Dawn

Finding the Balance

Dear friends,

This morning my emotions are as tumultuous as the weather--AND WE'RE HAVING ANOTHER BLIZZARD!!! You see, my family urged me to re-read my last post with an eye for what may seem like I was being critical of others. I could see it right away, when I re-read it and so I deleted the post immediately.

My goal in starting this blog never has been to be critical of others. If I have ever appeared that way to you, I beg your forgiveness!!! Those of you who REALLY know me know that, if I am critical of anyone, it is of MYSELF! I have a very strong melancholy personality and those of us with this disposition are very hard on ourselves. This tendency leads to such health problems as, for instance, shingles on our brains. I almost DIED of this tendency to be super-critical of myself and so I struggle daily to learn how to be kind to myself.

Furthermore, I would not ever discourage a person from seeking help through BodyTalk. Many of us have found our addictions fade away as we deal with the underlying issues which make us obsess in a certain area. Actually there is nobody walking the planet who isn't out of balance in some ways. I pray, then, that everyone who read yesterday's post will now understand that I was expressing a desire to be secure enough in myself so as to not allow others to abuse me.

I do realize that this will only happen when I stop abusing myself. At first it seemed like the right thing to do to delete that post which seemed critical of others. However, just minutes after I deleted the post, I received this comment on it. "What in the world are you saying to me, Lord," I prayed?

Dear Dawn: Jesus led me to your blog this morning; what a delight! Thank you for witnessing with such passion and joy. Sometimes I think healers can make the most difference in the subtlest ways....which attract those who are ready for transformation. Jesus doesn't SELL or ADVERTISE himself either...he just draws us to touch his robe. So, who is Cora? She is referenced twice...and I am clueless, and I didn't see a link to the blog of hers you reference.Your sister in Christ, Bethany Knightwww.tenderlovingcalling.blogspot.com

WOW--NOW WHAT DO I DO? I already deleted the post and don't have the heart or time to re-write it. Still, seeing as Jesus led this woman to read that blog post and to comment like this to encourage me, I felt led to share my real intention in writing yesterday.

I just want to say that I am healing and in no wise view myself as "There" yet. I sin (against myself too) and make mistakes every day for which I need to repent--just like everybody else. The joyful difference, though, of which I was writing yesterday is that I no longer feel like I need to disappear in order to please everybody.

In the program which I did years ago, called LOVE HUNGER, I learned that dysfunctional families don't allow their children to develop in the ways that God wants them to develop. They force the children to take roles so that all of the needs of the FAMILY can be met--even though this is not healthy for the children.

The four main roles are the black sheep; the hero; the family clown; and the lost child. The black sheep is forced to take the blame for ALL of the problems in the family. The hero can do no wrong, which is a lie as we're all sinners. The family clown is expected to be humorous at all times--even though great sorrows surround them. The lost child, which is the role that I played, is the one who bears the shame of the family. They're taught to keep their mouth shut to keep the family shame from being exposed.

This blog was begun over a year ago as my way of coming into being as a person. I no longer am willing to keep my mouth shut so that all of the takers of this world can continue walking all over me. I have found in BodyTalk the release from the negativity which kept me in slavery to the silence. I have found the peace that God intended for me to have all of my life. I feel that this gives me some hope to share with the world. That's why I named my blog A RAY OF HOPE.

I can see now that the Lord wanted to encourage me this morning not to give up on this worthy goal. How loving and kind He was to bring Bethany here today, for the very first time, and have her write what she did!!! Thank you so much Bethany and may God bless you richly for your obedience!!!

Still, I would not use this spot in cyberspace to harm anybody. So it is that I named this post FINDING THE BALANCE. I guess for the rest of my life I will be working towards finding the balance between protecting myself from the rejection and abuses of others while I am busily working to offer others the hope that I have found in God's natural ways of healing. If any of you have learned ways of accomplishing this, I would be grateful to hear your insights.

Now to answer your question about Cora, Bethany. Cora is my lovely 22-year-old daughter who lives with us here on our organic farm. Her blog is named: Maiden in the House of God, and I am sure that you would enjoy reading about our doings here on the farm. She writes daily of our family activities while I write more about my attempts to bring healing to those whom the Lord leads to me. The Lord led me to BodyTalk 2 years ago as I struggled to survive from shingles on my brain which began in 2006. I praise God that He is healing me daily and leading me to the place of peace that He has for ALL of His children--which is everybody on this planet.

Thanks to all for listening and I covet your prayers for my continued healing and growth. As I've been studying my Module 3 material, I am reminded that I can only help people as far as I have gone myself. So, like Paul, "I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. " Philippians 3:14

Dad's new home

If you are a regular reader on Cora's blog, then you already know that my dad is moved into his new Winter home. I still want to write about that day, though, as it was a big day in my life too.

On December 29th, the boys and I headed down to Eureka, SD (my home town) to meet with 4 of the staff members from their Assisted Living Facility. It was very much a Winter day and I'd much rather have stayed at home where it was toasty warm. I did a BodyTalk session on my dad on the way down, to help him with the transition, as Andrew drove quickly down to the meeting.

My brother, Duard, and his wife, Sharel were at the meeting too and had brought dad up to the meeting. I found dad calmly chatting with the pretty nurses, so he seemed in good spirits. This is the conference room where they meet with family members. We were told that we can reserve this room for family gatherings and have them cook our meals (if we let them know in advance) for the price of $5.10 per meal. I'm not sure why the 10 cents is necessary but that's the way it is. These ladies are the nurses from the hospital which has been moved upstairs. The facility where the residents live actually was the hospital which I was a patient in several times in the "Olden days." Nowdays one of the nurses goes through every 2 hours at night to check on the residents.

When the hospital quit having births, they moved the hospital upstairs and converted the main floor into this assisted living facility. It REALLY is quite spacious and VERY nicely decorated. I felt my spirits lifting as the ladies went over what the facility has to offer the elderly to help get them back on their feet--and then keep them there.

After the nurses shared what they have to offer, they went over the list of things that they expect from their residents. They expect Dad to eat his meals with the group in the dining room which is GREAT. He's had 8 months of eating alone and frankly, he's not eating one bit healthy. Dad is expected to participate in their group exercise every morning and the group activity in the afternoon. In fact, a resident can be asked to leave if they do not participate in group activities--they were quite serious about this. I sighed a deep sigh of relief when Dad said that he would "Give it a whirl for the winter." Here he's signing the admission papers.

I enjoyed seeing the nurses dealing with dad. He'd been lazy that morning and hadn't shaved. They said, "We'll let it slide today and then, after that, you get one warning, Harvey."

"Then what?" my dad asked.

"You DON'T WANT TO KNOW," the nurses teased but they made it clear that dad WILL keep himself clean, neat, and respectable at all times. HOW WONDERFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After the papers were signed, the nurses gave us a tour of the facility. This is the waiting room. I remember sitting on these wretchedly awful straight chairs in that very room when I was a girl and my parents were visiting somebody in the hospital. Can this be the SAME PLACE? Everyone is heading into the dining room.

Three times a day the residents gather here for their meals. In between times, they can come here for a glass of milk or juice or a light snack kept in the refrigerator. That day the snack in the frig was veggie pizza--YUMMMMMM. I made sure that Dad understood that he is NOT to drink directly out of the jug in THIS refrigerator--the nurses agreed wholeheartedly. :) Dad also has a small refrigerator in his room for moments when walking half way down the hallway is just too far to go for a drink of OJ. I don't suppose anyone will yell at him if he drinks out of THAT jug. :)

Right outside the dining room, we found this bulletin board. I guess they always have some little item here where residents can give small gifts to each other if they so desire. Not that dad lives there, there are 11 little stockings.

This is also where the schedule is posted for their group activities. I noticed that they have singers come in at times to do hymn sings with the residents. I asked if they would ever want US to do so or to bring our puppets in for the residents. OH YES--WE ARE VERY WELCOME TO DO SO!!!!!! They have a grand old upright piano in the corner for just such purposes. :)

When we got to Dad's new room, his new neighbor came over to greet us. LO AND BEHOLD, THIS WOMAN JUST HAPPENED TO BE OUR NEIGHBOR OUT ON THE FARM WHEN ROBERT AND I WERE NEWLYWEDS!!!!! This woman taught me to save seeds and was a wonderful neighbor to us! Next month she turns 99 years old and is in better shape than dad is. I'm so hoping that living in this place will be as good for Dad as it was for Mary who has lived there 6 years already.

This is Dad's room. It has a toilet in a spacious bathroom. We put a cabinet in there for him to store his laundry supplies--everyone in the building does their own laundry instead of paying someone else to do it. The frig is sitting on top of it. This is Sharel, Dad, Duard, and Bonnie who is one of the nurses in charge of the program.

This is the community shower. Each person has a time slot of their choice which they are expected to use daily. I wonder what Dad will think of such a waste of water? :)

Dad checking out the laundry room while Andrew and Lettie, the other nurse in charge of the program, look on.

This room is the beauty shop. :) The nurse said that Dad can ask any barber in town to come up there and cut his hair. He asked if his "Girl," would come up there to give him a haircut and they said, "Oh yes, she comes up here all the time." How's THAT for service? See the hymnals along the wall? They're for the hymn sings any time that they can get a pianist to play for them. :)

Well, once it was all agreed on, we took dad to his house and proceeded to take it apart. He needed a twin bed which is the one thing that he didn't have. Sharel told me that they had already ordered one with a built-in headboard that would be delivered the next day.

Dad needed his recliner; some lamps; a small table and chair; his laundry things; his clothes; and personal care items. My nephew, Cody, came over and we hustled. Within a few hours, everything was up in the room and the house looked like Swiss Cheese. I regretted that I didn't have time to make it look a little more homey, but there was no time, as we needed to get home for chores.

I did a load of laundry and Sharel came downstairs to talk about what else needed to be done. We decided that the best thing to do would be to empty the refrigerator. Just before we left, then, I went through the frig and threw out everything that had green growing on it. Then I sorted off what dad wanted to take up to his room and the rest we loaded up and brought home.

This was a VERY hard time for me. I was crying in Dad's basement, after I started the washing machine, when Sharel came in. I wished that I'd had more time to think it all over but I knew instinctively that if we didn't move him when he was willing to go, that we'd regret it later on. I said to her, "Some day you and I are going to have to go through everything that is in this house." We both groaned but I knew that somehow the Lord would give me the strength when that day comes.

The boys and I ate supper with my dad and then took a few more things up to dad's room. Andrew took this picture of Jacob and I in the group's living room. It all is very pretty and, for an institution, it is very homey. I didn't realize, until I looked at this picture later, how stressful the whole day was for me. I was STRESSED OUT but was stuffing it for dad's sake!!!!!!

After this, we visited with Mary a little longer; drove 80 miles home; and carried in the contents of Dad's refrigerator. When everyone went out to the barn for night chores, I tried so hard to make myself go out to the barn after I'd washed up the milking supplies. I walked over to the barn closet and looked at my barn clothes. That's when the alarm went off in my head which I got used to listening to in '06. It said, "You've had enough stress for one day, Dawn."

Then I went over to the food and decided that I should at least be useful enough and put the food away. I started looking through the 4 boxes of things when the alarm got louder. I literally do hear an alarm in my head when I've reached the limits of my endurance. I listened to it for 4 months in '06 when I had a freight train running through my brain constantly night and day.

Finally I LISTENED to the alarm and went into the whirlpool room and started filling the water. Even with a wonderful, long soak that night, the next morning I felt as though the freight train had run over me. Still, there was a peace that I'd not had in 8 months since mom's death. I did Access on myself; popped 2Tylenol; and headed to work in my office in Bismarck. All that day I noticed that a most glorious calm was starting to seep into my spirit. It grew and grew all day and hope started to enter in where the despair had been. GLORY!!!

That wonderful peace has stayed and I know that the reason is because DAD IS IN A SAFE PLACE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! As hard as it was for him to leave his home, his new home is a very nice place! Now he's with other people who use walkers when they need them; who exercise daily while sitting on the couch; who need to sleep 12 hours a night; and whose children were getting stressed out by having them alone in their homes after their spouses died. Besides all of that, he can come and go as he pleases! What could be better?????

PRAISE THE LORD FOR DAD'S NEW HOME!!!!!!!!! I'm sending many thanks to all of you who prayed for him to get over the hump of mom's sudden death. God bless!

Dawn