Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Find us Faithful


 It's been an afternoon of searching my memories for all of my failures as a mother.  Why couldn't I see them before?  I guess nobody really wants to see how terribly we've hurt our children.

As I grieved with great sorrows, I resorted to my BETAR table.  I chose Steve Green's CD as a lot of his songs have a nice rhythm which help to drive out negative trapped energies.

I wept and grieved and then this song started playing.

My breath stopped as I listened and tried to remember why it held such strong memories for me.  Then I recalled that I sang it at the family service for my mother when she died 8 years ago.

As I listened, peace returned.  Sure, I'm an imperfect mom!  Sure, I said and did things that harmed my children in ways that I couldn't have known.  Sure, I have regrets but then there's THIS!

In all of my doubting; in all my illness; in all of my pain and sorrow I have done my best to point my children to the Lord!  I HAVE been faithful to HIM!

Perhaps that's more important than everything bad I did combined?????

Perhaps, but then there's always, "I'm sorry!"


Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Appleseed instructors

Over the past 9 years, I have been privileged to attend many Appleseed shoots!  Each one was an incredible experience!! Each one made me a better person IE less wimpy; more determined; more vocal concerning my rights; more supported by the incredible people who attend and who lead; PLUS I'm a better shot!!

We have had some stupendous shoot bosses namely Alex from Iowa; Kyle from Minnesota; Chris from North Dakota; Steve from Texas; Alex from Minnesota; Jonathan from North Dakota; Tom from Pennsylvania; Dr Rich from Illinois; and now our very own, Andrew Bornemann from North Dakota!!  YAY TO YOU ALL!!!  Also a shout out to Paul, our newest Instructor in training, and to all of the shooters who have filled our firing lines over the years.  You're all WINNERS!!!!!

Lest you think that it is an easy task to become an Instructor with the Appleseed program, I am enclosing these details from their website.  As you read through this, you will come to see the tremendous responsibility that lies on the shoulders of a shoot boss. 

Many people with many firearms must be watched constantly.  Safety is the number 1 concern!  It's that simple.

There's much to be taught and much to learn and it's exciting beyond measure to be a part of a firing line for freedom.  As I think of the attacks that we're having in our world these days, knowing how to shoot a firearm, and how to shoot it well becomes even more significant!

Here's the requirements for all who enter as a leader with the Appleseed program.  There's no pay except the joy of seeing the light of freedom burning brightly in the shooters.  In fact, many of those I've mentioned above, traveled at their own expense to keep the program growing and well.  THESE ARE TRUE HEROES TO ME!!!

If you want to meet someone who loves freedom; who cares about keeping people safe; who conquers their own fears to become a leader; I urge you to attend an Appleseed near you this Summer!


I can hardly wait and I'm hoping to inspire YOU to attend a shoot this Summer!


The Project Appleseed™ Instructor

Part teacher. Part storyteller.

Becoming a Project Appleseed instructor isn’t easy, but it does offer its own unique set of rewards. After all, shooting instruction is only part of the job. The other part is being able to reconnect students with the people and events that helped shape our country, along with the ideals we all hope to preserve from that time.
To become instructor eligible for Project Appleseed, a shooter must attend at least two Appleseeds and achieve a score of 210 or better on the Appleseed Qualification Test (AQT) while shooting from multiple positions. If it’s determined that a potential candidate has the skills and temperament to become an Appleseed instructor, he or she may receive the “orange hat” of an Instructor-in-Training. Then the fun really begins.
Project Appleseed is only as good as its instructors. For that reason, it takes a lot for an individual to earn the coveted instructor’s “Red Hat.” As everyone who attends an Appleseed event quickly learns, the training and hands-on experience of Appleseed instructors result in an experience and level of excellence that’s hard to find anywhere else!

Instructor Boot Camp

An Instructor Boot Camp (IBC) concentrates on teaching instructors and potential instructors how to teach at an Appleseed. The emphasis is on how to teach — not how to shoot. Each student at an IBC should already know the fundamentals of how to shoot. If you’re interested in a fast track to instructor status, think about attending one of our upcoming IBCs.

Instructor Training Requirements for Project Appleseed

  • Pass a series of five written, oral and hands-on tests.
  • Mastery of RWVA Instructor Manual and other training materials.
  • Understudy other instructors at a minimum of five Appleseeds.
  • Perform selected teaching duties under the supervision of a full instructor including telling the three-part history of the events of April 19, 1775.
  • Mastery of Appleseed’s safety protocols including running a safe line.
  • Demonstrating an exact knowledge of Appleseed’s instructional method, including the proper positions, steady hold factors, natural point of aim, rifleman’s cadence, and the six steps of firing a shot.

Sunday, May 21, 2017

Appleseed Shoot for Patriots

In today’s world of 24-hour news cycles, changing technologies, and push-button gratification, it’s a challenge to stay connected to the values that our great country was built on. Ideals like integrity, commitment, and personal responsibility are what our founding fathers relied on to win our independence and to then make America a great nation. At Project Appleseed™, we’re dedicated to keeping these timeless values alive. We promote civic responsibility through the teaching of colonial history and the American tradition of rifle marksmanship. Even after all of these years, there is much to be learned from our forefathers’ examples of perseverance, commitment, and civic virtue. With a full calendar of shooting clinics and events, Project Appleseed is here to make sure these timeless principles live on for generations to come.

Skilled Marksmanship: An American Tradition

You can’t write the story of America without including several chapters about the skill and bravery of our forefathers. On April 19, 1775, at Lexington and Concord, American colonists stood with muskets in hand and faced down the British forces that were trying to seize their arms. The colonists did it with grit, determination, and superior marksmanship. They were real marksmen: nobly and ably putting their skills on the line in pursuit of liberty.
We are the descendants of those fearless men and women who earned our freedom on the battlefield. We honor their pursuit of liberty by passing along the skills and knowledge that aided them in securing it. Today’s Rifleman understands that owning and mastering a rifle is part of his/her American heritage. Whether you’re a new shooter or a seasoned marksman, Project Appleseed can help transform you from a person with a rifle into a principled and skilled Rifleman.

OK OK so I copied this from the Appleseed website.  Why not?  Why try to reinvent the wheel?  So what I"m saying is this: IT'S APPLESEED TIME AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you live near us, join us here on June 16th and 17th for 2 great days of community building shooting together.  I dare you to join us on the firing line! 

If you're not anywhere near us, then look for a shoot near you.  Bring a friend with you and improve your shooting together.  If you don't have any shooting friends, we'll be your friend.  All you need is a desire to improve your shooting; to become a better citizen; and to make new friends who love our country as much as you do!

See YOU on the firing line in June!!


Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Newest twist

When a person has been ill most of their life, as I have, you keep searching for the underlying causes for what is causing the problem.  My friend, Ed says, "We have to find the cause behind the cause behind the cause....."  

Ed is right.

There is something wrong with me.  I have found a way to live mostly peaceably with MS.  I have learned to support my heart in the way that it needs me to.  I have many tools that help me maintain my emotional health.  I dare not go a day without doing Lumosity if I want to be able to function as a practitioner, which I do, so I fight the mental decline of MS with that tool.

 That aside, there is something wrong with me!  My daughter said not too long ago, "What is it that keeps you from getting well?  Why is it that things that help others only help you for a little while if at all?"  Yes, INDEED.

 Well, I think that I may have been led to the answer to that question.  As I read this article, I felt tingles going up and down my spine.  When I read this statement, I had the first real hope that I've had for a recovery in over a decade.  When this goes undiagnosed and untreated it becomes very challenging for these individuals to ever get well despite the use of holistic therapies.  Most will struggle with their health throughout their life and never find any long-term answers.  BULLS-EYE!

This explains why I could have this issue.  Pyroluria is a genetic condition that is typically related to familial alcoholism and/or environmental toxicity.  If an individual has a family history of alcoholism they may very well have this genetic mutation.  It can be induced with childhood trauma or a chronic infection early in life.  The onset usually begins in the late teens and is often triggered by a traumatic life event.

So, I've got a genetic condition from my parents who both have alcoholism in their family lines.  Several close family members were/are alcoholics.  I recall my collage days hearing my subconscious mind warning me to keep away from alcohol as I had the capability for alcoholism.

 As for the traumatic life event, which one should I mention?  I guess none of them but, if you've read here for any length of time, you get the picture.

 So, I did it!

 I ordered the test for pyroluria from  Yesterday I took a sample and sent it to the lab who tests for pyroluria.  The results will go to Dr. Jockers who will make recommendations based on the presence and the severity of this hidden enemy in my life.

 I know that I need to do more tapping on this.  It seems sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo unfair that after surviving an alcholic home, with all of it's abuses, I ended up with this enemy!!!  I've been in pain (physical, mental, emotional) for so long that I can't remember when I wasn't hurting.  Could I FINALLY have come face to face with that underlying monster that is making all remedies only band-aids for a few minutes; a few hours; or a few days at the very best?

 I'm sharing this with you all in case you are one of the many who are dealing with this without knowing about it.  Please take the Pyroluria Questionnaire which is listed below.  If you answer at least 15 of these with a yes, then I urge you to contact Dr. Jockers for a test kit.  

 I'll let you know my test results as soon as I hear.  In the meantime, I'll be reading all I can find on this and share if I find any more helpful information.  

If this sounds like something that you have been dealing with, the very first step I would urge you to take is to forgive everyone whose alcoholism has messed with your happiness.  We forgive for US!




Pyroluria: The Most Common Unknown Disorder

Pyroluria, also called Malvaria, is a unique metabolic condition that is very rarely recognized in both the medical and natural health world.   Some researchers in the orthomolecular medicine and orthomolecular psychiatry believe that up to 10% of the population has this metabolic condition (1).  It is considered by many in the functional medicine world the most common unknown disorder.  Pyrolurics need a specific diet, lifestyle and supplementation program to get well.
Pyroluria is a genetic condition that is typically related to familial alcoholism and/or environmental toxicity.  If an individual has a family history of alcoholism they may very well have this genetic mutation.  It can be induced with childhood trauma or a chronic infection early in life.  The onset usually begins in the late teens and is often triggered by a traumatic life event.

The Symptoms Associated with Pyroluria:

It is estimated that as many as 50% of those with autism, 40% of alcoholics, 70% of schizophrenics, 70% of depressed individuals and 30% of people with ADHD have pyroluria (2, 3).  When this goes undiagnosed and untreated it becomes very challenging for these individuals to ever get well despite the use of holistic therapies.  Most will struggle with their health throughout their life and never find any long-term answers.
The symptoms of pyroluria include chronic anxiety, poor stress tolerance, digestive issues, poor immunity, joint pain, acne or eczema, mood swings and poor short term memory.  These individuals often have difficulty digesting and absorbing protein and they are easily wrecked by increasing stress (4, 5, 6).

Diagnosing Pyroluria:

Pyroluria can be diagnosed through a specific Kryptopyrroles urine test.  Normal amounts of kryptophyrroles in the urine should be less than 20 ug/dl.  Numbers greater than 20 ug/dl would be a positive test for the diagnosis of pyroluria (7).  Many clinicians have found that this number should be less than 15 ug/dl.
The lab that I use for this test measures kryptopyrroles in mcg/dl and the number should be less than 9 mcg/dl.  Anything between 10-15 is considered mild pyroluria, 15-19 is moderate and anything above 20 mcg/dl, we consider a severe case.
Other warning signs you may have this disorder include an inability to remember dreams, hair loss, light, thin pale skin that is prone to stretch marks, white spots on the fingernails and poor tooth enamel (8).
The topic of Pyroluria was discussed in a lot of detail on the Depression Sessions online video series.  You can check this program out here, although it is not airing for free anymore, it is a very low price and well worth the value of the educational videos and transcripts you will receive.

What is Pyroluria:

There are several waste products that are produced when the body makes hemoglobin for the red blood cells.  These waste products are called kryptopyrroles which are technically called hydroxyhemoppyrrolin-2-one (HPL) which are typically excreted by our body.  Individuals with pyroluria are unable to clear the HPL effectively and they build up in the system (9, 10).
The HPL binds strongly to zinc, biotin and vitamin B6 which are critical nutrients for cellular metabolism.   Over a period of time, the body becomes very deficient in these critical nutrients and symptoms arise.  These people will often go years suffering the effects of this disorder despite a clean diet, supplementation and holistic therapies.

Nutrition & Supplementation:

Pyrolurics have a greater need for omega-6 fatty acids than most in our society (11, 12).  They need both arachidonic acid (AA) and Gamma linolenic acid (GLA).  A diet rich in pastured eggs, pasture-fed butter, grass-fed beef and wild game and organ meats supplies the body with significant amounts of essential fats.  These foods are also rich in zinc.
GLA is found in borage oil, evening primrose oil, black current seed oil and hemp oil.  This is typically supplemented with one of these sources as it is hard to get enough in our diet.
These individuals need to supplement with zinc and co-enzymated form of vitamin B6 called P-5-P (13, 14).  A general methyl donating supplement with P-5-P and other methyl donors such as trimethylglycine, methyl-folate, methyl-B12 and riboflavin 5’phosphate sodium is quite effect with this process.
Vitamin B6 is found in seafood, meat and green leafy veggies among other things.  However, the number one way we get B6 into our system is through fiber that our gut microbes break down and produce B6 as a byproduct of their metabolism of the fibers.   Probiotics and fermented foods are also necessary for these individuals to reduce inflammatory gut related stress and heal appropriately.

Lifestyle & Supplements Get Results:

With the right diet, supplementation and stress reduction most pyrolurics see results very quickly.  More severe cases usually experience slow progressive results.  Very stubborn cases are typically having issues with heavy metals or mold toxins.
They will need to remain on this lifestyle with moderate supplementation for the rest of their life or risk symptoms coming back.  Typically, large doses of supplementation is used in the beginning and the individual tapers down to smaller doses as they feel better and have a return to nutrient sufficient status.
Clinically, I use high doses of zinc, methylation support, mitochondrial support (CoQ10, Lipoic Acid, N-Acetyl Cysteine), Probiotics and GLA.

Testing for Zinc and B6 Status:

The easiest way to test for zinc sufficiency is through a zinc tally test.  This is a test done by tasting a liquid zinc supplement.  With zinc sufficiency the liquid tastes awful but those who are deficient in zinc will not taste the liquid supplement.  This is a positive flag for a zinc deficiency.  Blood work could also be done to verify but most experts like the zinc tally test as it is easy and inexpensive.
The subjective test for B6 sufficiency is the return of regular dreaming that the individual can remember.  They don’t have to remember the entire dream but bits and pieces is a sign of sufficiency.  When they are deficient they will typically be unable to remember anything about their dreams (15).

Additional Tips to Know:

Pyrolurics also need to be sure to eat very clean and avoid phytate containing foods such as grains, nuts, legumes and soy.  Phytic acids in these foods bind to major minerals like zinc and render them useless in our body (16).  Soaking and sprouting legumes and nuts reduces the phytate count.
Due to zinc deficient states they are more susceptible to heavy metal toxicity from mercury, cadmium and copper.  When the individual is unable to develop a zinc sufficient state despite very large supplemental usage it is most likely related to heavy metal toxicity.  Special testing can be done for heavy metal levels.
Chronic stress, alcohol consumption, sugar consumption, smoking and pharmaceutical drugs will all further aggravate the symptoms and severity of pyroluria.

Pyroluria Questionnaire:

The following includes the most common symptoms associated with the condition Pyroluria.  If you answer “yes” to 15 or more of these then further testing may be worthwhile:
1. Little or no dream recall
2. White spots on finger nails
3. Poor morning appetite +/- tendency to skip breakfast
4. Morning nausea
5. Pale skin +/- poor tanning +/- burn easy in sun
6. Sensitivity to bright light
7. Hypersensitive to loud noises
8. Reading difficulties (e.g. dyslexia)
9. Poor ability to cope with stress
10.  Mood swings or temper outbursts
11.  Histrionic (dramatic) tendency
12.  Argumentative/enjoy argument
13.  New situations or changes in routine (i.e., traveling) particularly stressful
14.  Much higher capability and alertness in the evening, compared to mornings
15.  Poor short term memory
16.  Abnormal body fat distribution
17.  Belong to an all-girl family with look-alike sisters
18.  Dry skin
19.  Anxiousness
20.  Reaching puberty later than normal
21.  Difficulty digesting, a dislike of protein or a history of vegetarianism
22.  Tendency toward being a loner and/or avoiding larger groups of people
23.  Stretch marks on skin
24.  Poor sense of smell or taste
25.  Feel very uncomfortable with strangers
26.  Frequently experience fatigue
27.  A tendency to overreact to tranquilizers, barbiturates, alcohol or other drugs (in other words, a little produces a powerful response)
28.  A tendency toward anemia
29.  History of mental illness or alcoholism in family
30.  Easily upset by criticism
31.  Sweet smell (fruity odor) to breath or sweat when ill or stressed
32.  Prone to acne, eczema or psoriasis
33.  A tendency toward feeling anxious, fearful and carrying lifelong inner tension
34.  Difficulty recalling past events or people
35.  Bouts of depression or nervous exhaustion
36.  Prone to frequent colds or infections
I have a specific blood test that lets me know if someone is positive for the Pyroluric condition and I have a specialized nutrition and supplement protocol to help these individuals regain their health.

Sources For This Article Include:

  1. Nutritional Healing – Pyroluria
  2. HOFFER A, OSMOND H. MALVARIA: A NEW PSYCHIATRIC DISEASE. Acta Psychiatr Scand. 1963;39:335-66. PMID: 14078702
  3. Gebel L. [Occurrence of the mauve factor in schizophrenia]. Psychiatr Pol. 1973 Mar-Apr;7(2):153-9. Polish. PMID: 4710987
  4. HOFFER A, MAHON M. The presence of unidentified substances in the urine of psychiatric patients. J Neuropsychiatr. 1961 Aug;2:331-62. PMID: 13714995
  5. HOFFER A. The presence of malvaria in some mentally retarded children. Am J Ment Defic. 1963 Mar;67:730-2. PMID: 13963913
  6. Ellman GL, Jones RT, Rychert RC. Mauve spot and schizophrenia. Am J Psychiatry. 1968 Dec;125(6):849-51. PMID: 5698458
  7. A Rapid Screening Test for Pyroluria; Useful in Distinguishing a Schizophrenic Subpopulation Link Here
  8. Hoffer A. Malvaria and the law. Psychosomatics. 1966 Sep-Oct;7(5):303-10. PMID: 5912644
  9. Walker JL. Neurological and behavioral toxicity of kryptopyrrole in the rat. Pharmacol Biochem Behav. 1975 Mar-Apr;3(2):243-50. PMID: 1096175
  10. Krischer K, Pfeiffer CC. Biochemical relationship between kryptopyrrole (mauve factor and trans-3-methyl-2-hexenoic acid (schizophrenia odor). Res Commun Chem Pathol Pharmacol. 1973 Jan;5(1):9-15. PMID: 4686114
  11. Heleniak EP, Lamola SW. A new prostaglandin disturbance syndrome in schizophrenia: delta-6-pyroluria. Med Hypotheses. 1986 Apr;19(4):333-8. PMID: 3520252
  12. Horrobin DF, Huang YS. Schizophrenia: the role of abnormal essential fatty acid and prostaglandin metabolism. Med Hypotheses. 1983 Mar;10(3):329-36. PMID: 6348496
  13. Treatment of Pyroluric Schizophrenia (Malvaria) With Large Doses of Pyridoxine and a Dietary Supplement of Zinc Link Here
  14. Zinc and Manganese in the Schizophrenias Link Here
  15. Ebben M, Lequerica A, Spielman A. Effects of pyridoxine on dreaming: a preliminary study. Percept Mot Skills. 2002 Feb;94(1):135-40. PMID: 11883552
  16. Torre M, Rodriguez AR, Saura-Calixto F. Effects of dietary fiber and phytic acid on mineral availability. Crit Rev Food Sci Nutr. 1991;30(1):1-22. PMID: 1657026

Sunday, May 14, 2017

A mother's thoughts

 If you've come here for very long, you know how very much I love my children Cora, Andrew, and Jacob! 

You know that they are the ones who I kept living for in '06 when I was dying from a mysterious disease. 

You know that they are the ones I gave 22 years of my life for to assist them in their educational process. 

You know the joys I felt on their wedding days and the hopes that I hold in my heart for another wedding day in the future.

You know the excitement I feel for this September when there will be new family members that join us on this Earth. 

You know of my grief that never stops, only ebbs and flows like the tides, for those children that I have sent ahead of me to Heaven. 

I know that they are happy!  I know that they are loved but I also know that they are missed even now.  When I think of my future with them in Heaven, I am comforted.  When I think of my life here without them, though, I think of all the things that I missed out on.

 I wondered if I could find a poem that would express this for me.  When I found this one, I thought of my living children immediately.  Then I thought of those who have passed.  I thought of all that was taken from me and I weep now today, on Mother's Day, for my empty arms and my lonely heart that they never filled!! 

My heart grieves today most of all for the times that I never had with them!  The birthdays we never got to celebrate.  The books I never got to read to them with them snuggling close to me on the couch.  The graduations that never happened................. the weddings that never took place............... the grandbabies that were never born.........................

Oh my aching heart, will you never stop grieving their loss?

NO--not until Heaven is my home!

So, to those of you in the midst of all that parenting means, please know that this time is a GIFT to you from God!!!!  PLEASE cherish every minute with your little ones; not-so-little ones; and your adult children!!  They ARE God's gift to us!!


Being Your Mother

Being your Mother
means that I have had the opportunity
to experience loving someone
more than I love myself.
I have learned what it's like
to experience joy and pain
through someone else's life.

It has brought me pride and joy;
your accomplishments touch me
and thrill me like no one else's can.

It has brought me
a few tears and heartaches at times,
but it has taught me hope and patience.
It has shown me the depth,
strength, and power of love.

Being your mother
hasn't always been easy,
and I'm sure
I've said or done things that have hurt or confused you.
But no one has ever made me as satisfied
as you do just by being happy.
No one has made me as proud as you do just by living up to your responsibilities.

No one's smile
has ever warmed my heart
like yours does;
no one's laughter
fills my heart with delight
as quickly as yours can.

No one's hugs feel as sweet,
and no one's dreams
mean as much to me as yours do.

No other memories of bad times have miraculously
turned into important lessons or humorous stories;
the good times have become precious treasures
to relive again and again.

You are a part of me,
and no matter what happened in the past
or what the future holds,
you are someone
I will always accept,
forgive, appreciate, adore,
and love unconditionally.

Being your mother
means that I've been given
one of life's greatest gifts: you.
Author: Barbara Cage