I love our menfolk--Robert, Andrew, and Jacob

Have you ever thought about how much work the men of the world do every day to make OUR world a nicer place to live? I know that I often just take our menfolk for granted so this post is my apology for not saying, "Thank you guys," more often. Our menfolk here on our farm, Seeds of Honor, work all year long to produce high quality, organic, food for the world. That's not all they do, though. They give us girls, Cora and I, a high-quality life as well. Although I've always been very prudent in the spending of our funds, Robert sees to it that I have many wonderful blessings each day. Perhaps you may not have ever thought of the things I'm going to show pictures of as blessings from a loving husband (and a loving God), but they are. My prayer then in posting today, is to encourage each of you who has a man of God blessing you each day with a wonderful life, to begin to show appreciation for all of the little things that he does for you each day. Of course when he does a really BIG thing, then he deserves a great BIG thank you as I am doing right now. :)

First of all, I want to thank you, Robert, for giving me my wish of a goat herd. I admit that at times it has become overwhelmingly large, but goats are just so prolific that this can happen without one even noticing it. I remember when it went from 40 to 120 in 1 year. That was DEFINITELY sell-back time. :) These are most of our current goats of all sizes and colors when Andrew threw them in a branch from a tree that was growing by the grain bins. YUM.


Thanks too, sweetie, for all of the dogs you've let me mother. We should sit down and count them once. This is our current pooch, Millie, who has been with us a whole year and is getting quit good at fetching the Frisbee when someone has time to toss it to her after evening chores.


Here's a "Pet" that Cora is quite fond of. My girl has always loved playing with frogs to the point that any time someone finds one, they bring it to her to love. Thanks for understanding even this, Robert. :) By the way, the one that you brought to her this morning jumped out of her hand and gave me quite a surprise as it was headed towards my face.



How many times do we really thank God, or our husbands, for all of the wonderful food that they provide for us every day. How wonderful the fruit of summer is when you live in North Dakota and have 6 months of winter. Here is my version of the golden arches. Thanks for providing us with wholesome food, sweetie, even if we do have to do the work for the veggies. You still provided the wonderful soil with fresh manure every Spring. Good job!

I think one of the biggest blessings you give to us Robert, Andrew, & Jacob is a day off from milking every so often. It's especially appreciated when friends have special occasions. Here our friends from our city days, married their daughter to a fine, young man. Congratulations Steve and Susan on raising such a lovely daughter named Kjersti!! Thanks for inviting us and thanks, guys, for the chores-free day! Steve is giving Kjersti away to Jason--talk about a gift!

Thank you, Robert, for all of the nice things in life that I just couldn't seem to do without. Things like a popcorn popper; and popcorn; and oil; and butter; and nacho cheese topping; and bowls to put it in after it's popped. I guess I would be remiss in not adding to the list, "Thanks for my new stove!" Then there's the electricity needed; the hot pads; the stool that I sit on... You give me so much in all of the "Little" things of life. OH, HOW I LOVE MAKING POPCORN--eating it too! Thanks for giving me all of these joys, Robert, especially when you don't even like popcorn. What a wonderful husband you are to me!!!!!!!!!

Now, here's for the really big thing that he and the boys did for all of us yesterday. The deck on this house was in sorry shape when we got here and that was almost 6 years ago. Being it rained and we couldn't hay yesterday, I finally worked up my courage to ask Robert and the boys to take the railing off completely. Robert went to work at once and started cutting it off.

Here it is all in pieces which made a grand campfire last night. :)

God bless Robert Bornemann for he took the extra lumber which was railings on the top of the deck; cut it in pieces to fill the holes; and repaired the floor which was in terrible shape. There were many places in it where we had just walked around because we didn't want to fall in the holes. We didn't really want to repair it because we want to build a new one when we get the house remodeling done some year. However, here was a problem that didn't take any money to fix and our men went straight to work to fix it. YEAH MEN!!!

Here is the finished product of their 2 hours work. Can you believe that they accomplished so much in only 2 hours? Now it's up to us girls to finish the job. I know that we have some deck stain downstairs in the dungeon somewhere but Fern had her deck painted and that looked nice too. I wonder which would stand up the best in case it is awhile until we can build a new deck. Anybody know?

Well, there are many more pictures that I could show of our menfolk working on the farm, and around the house, but these are the most interesting ones from the July folder. My goal in sharing this with you is for you to take a real look at all that your menfolk do for you every day, and find a special way to show them appreciation. Our guys really like pie so I suppose that I should get to work. :) Still, I don't know if you're like me, but a few words of appreciation go a loooooong way to keep me feeling special. How about we all take a few moments to say something NICE to our menfolk today and see them grinning from ear to ear. :)

A tribute to Josephine

Well, I found my dear, 2 years young friend Josephine dead in the barn this morning! ): She was pretty bad last night when we got home from Bismarck, but I didn't give up hope. I gave her a shot of penicillin and did cortices for her again. Every chores since she accidentally got into the barn lime (which we use to spread on the barn floors before a new batch of calves), I've been giving her the milk from the other goats--about 2 quarts. There's not much extra production, as the kids are taking most of it now, but she got every drop. Last night she didn't want it, though, so my heart sank. I also gave her mineral oil each chores with the hopes that the poison would pass in the stool.

I guess it was her time to go even if I didn't think it was. My friend, Kimberly, had a goat live to age 17 so I never gave it a thought that I'd have to give her up so soon. Here's a picture of her from March of this year when she gave birth to twins. I had named the buckling, George for George Eschobar who spoke at the home school convention. Later I had named the doeling, Mary, to go with the George in IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE! We lost George when he was a few weeks old, so Mary is all that is left of this trio. She's the spotted one and is a bit wild so I can't imagine that she'll ever fill the empty spot in my heart that Joe has left.

I know there are probably lots of people who think that I'm a nut for grieving after Joe like this, but this friend greeted me twice a day when I went out to milk the goats. While I milked, Josephine would come up beside me and gently nuzzle her head up against my shoulder. She was always beside me when I was anywhere in the goat barn or pen. Joe never cared that I was wearing old, dirty barn clothes. She never cared that my hair was a wreck or I was hurting too much to lean over and hug her. She just looked up into my face and let me scratch her soft neck as she moved her head side to side. Honest to God, I miss her a million times more than I miss my mother!!!!!!!!! Who will eat oats out of my hand now or push her face up against mine while I milk the others? Oh Joe, why did you leave me when you had so much life ahead of you?

In 2002 when my favorite horse, Gabriel, died of West Nile disease I told Robert that I would never love another horse and I meant it. I haven't even wanted to touch a horse since that grueling week-long ordeal. Of course there haven't been any around to touch as the children sold their horse, Ben, shortly after to get the money to buy a trampoline. Now I feel the same way. All other goats are just animals--Joe was my friend who would listen to everything I told her and never judge me or gossip about what I said behind my back. She always loved being close to me even last night when she was in horrible pain. I could tell that my presence was a comfort to her even hours before her death. One other time I loved a goat like I loved Joe, so maybe I will again, but it's going to be a long time off.

Sometimes I actually think that loving isn't worth it. Sometimes I love a person and they turn their back on me just when I need them the most. Sometimes I love an animal and they die. Sometimes I say to Robert, "I give up on love." That's when he takes me in his arms and says, "Don't you dare. Your loving heart keeps my world going, girl." So I try again for I know that there are hurting people or animals in the world who need a little compassion now and then. How could I ever withhold that from them? Still, I will guard my heart now and cherish the memory of this wonderful friend whom I had named Josephine March Bornemann 2 years ago in the Spring when I bottle-fed her because her mama wouldn't take her.



PS. The death toll now is 3, with 2 almost recovered, and one still iffy. Please pray for Cora's doe, Lily. It's not certain yet if she'll pull through it or not.

PPS. I spent an hour this morning cleaning up the 2 bags of barn lime which they had strewn all over the bags of kelp and cattle mineral. I put it in pails but it was too heavy for me to move up to the storage room in the barn, so I covered the pails. I guess I should have done that about 3 days ago. ): Somebody stronger than me will have to lug them up the hill to the barn but at least it is out of their reach if they should happen to break out again.

Goat report

I'm sure in this world of woes, this may seem VERY insignificant to many people. However, if you have ever loved a goat, you will understand my sorrow over this sudden disaster. Here is the goat report from tonight's chores.

Well, the 2 cases of "Eating barn-lime disease" who were mild this morning are doing fair tonight. I'm pretty sure that they'll pull through but I still gave the triplet's mom another dose of mineral oil. Andrew's yearling doe is dead. She was VERY sick this morning. Elizabeth is still dead so there was no change there. Translation: 2 goats are dead so far from this.

Now for my Josephine. Joe is better than she was this morning. She came out of the barn and ate a little hay. I was concerned when she wouldn't drink the milk with charcoal in it as she guzzled this like mad this morning. I left it out there for her in case she changes her mind. She did take about half a cup of mineral oil. Jacob and I both prayed for her and then had an idea which I hope will tip the scales in her favor. We went over and wrestled down her kid, Mary. What a wild thing she is but, after Jacob got drug around the pen for about 2 minutes, I managed to catch up with them. He hung on tight so I was proud of him!

When we finally got her over to the barn with Joe, it was worth all the effort. Joe seemed to perk right up. Jacob had said before we began this adventure, "Mary doesn't need her mom any more--she's big enough to live without the milk." "No" I agreed, "but her mama needs her tonight to have a reason to hang on." PLEASE PRAY FOR MY JOSEPHINE TO MAKE IT THROUGH THE NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I need to get things ready for tomorrow so I'll sign off. Jacob and I are heading to Bismarck. I'm seeing a special client at the center and Jacob and I are both seeing Dr. Faye for cranio-sacral sessions. I'm also going to try to consign mom's high quality clothes that nobody wants here and donate the lower end of things that were better than shop rag quality. I hope that it's worth the hassles but I have to do something with all of these clothes. I do have another treasure from mom to write about sometime but it'll have to wait as I want to take pictures and I'm too busy for that now.

Off to exercise,

Dawn

Tragedy in the goat barn

I'm not kidding--I would call this a tragedy. I've been accused of being melodramatic (probably inherent in a melancholy), but anybody who has ever loved a goat would call this a tragedy.

This morning, when Jacob and I walked into the goat barn, the first thing I noticed was that Josephine was not feeling well. You know how you get this feeling when something is not right? Well, she had her head down and she didn't jump up and say, "Hi," and she didn't shove her way in around the troughs when we fed them their oats. I knew that she was really sick and she was just fine last night. I can't stand the thought of losing Josephine as she is a sister to Christina. I loved Christina more than all the other goats as I had raised her to give as my love gift to some motherless children in '06. Christina's mom died shortly after giving me Josephine, and if Joe dies, I will be upset!!!!!!!!!!!!

When I walked further into the barn, I saw that Elizabeth was dead. She had a terrible disposition, but was a great milker. ): In the other corner, Andrew's yearling goat Hannah, was laying almost dead. Jacob and I decided to get them out of the barn back on pasture even though their cell is almost grazed clean and we haven't had time to hot wire another one for them.

Cora was spraying Sonic Bloom on the garden, but she came to help us move the herd. That was when she noticed that Karen, mother of triplets this spring, has "IT" too. Karen was very wobbly and obviously in pain although she made the trip over to the goat cell.

Robert came over to help move the herd and then he recalled that he had caught the goats in the Quonset yesterday afternoon. They were going after the kelp like mad, which couldn't hurt them, but some of them were also eating the barn lime which was in bags next to the kelp. ): OH NO. This was when Cora mentioned that her goat, Harriet, died a few weeks ago right after they were in there too! ):

A quick conference to plan the day ended up with the guys heading over to the fields to bale; Jacob's driving the 9030 over there; and Cora is continuing with the Sonic Bloom. This left ME to treat the sick goats. Robert suggested mineral oil and left, so this is what I just did.

After a quick prayer for guidance, I started with Joe as she is most precious to me. I gave her 10 ccs of Vitamin C in the rump which must have hurt for some reason as she bawled terribly. I put charcoal in the milk from this morning and she drank it all. Then I gave her mineral oil by tipping the bottle into the side of her mouth. She drank as much as she wanted.

I was out of milk for Hannah but gave her the charcoal in some water which she guzzled gratefully. She also drank the mineral oil eagerly. Then I went over to the cell where Karen was laying moaning. She also guzzled the mineral oil but didn't like the charcoal water as much as Joe and Hannah did. She's not as ill, though, so I guess she can afford to be picky.

When I was working with Karen, Andrew's goat Annette, groaned beside me and I could see that she was starting to get sick too. I gave her the rest of the charcoal water which she guzzled gratefully. That makes 4 of my does who are sick for now and 1 is dead already-plus Cora's dead goat 2 weeks ago. I'd call that a tragedy.

So now I used biofeedback to determine that they'll all need mineral oil again in 2 hours from now. I'm not sure how that will work as I have a lady coming from Linton for a session at 2:00. Maybe Cora will do it but she just does not like working with sick animals. She said, "It's just not in my disposition." I can't say that I like working with the sick, but it nags at me if I know something that can help them and I don't do it. That leaves me with going to do a BodyTalk session for them now, although I really do need to pick up this place some before 2:00.

PLEASE PRAY FOR MY GOATS TODAY. Somebody once said that watching a horse die is the hardest thing they'd ever done. I do recall watching Gabe die of West Nile in 2002. That truly was terrible too, but seeing my beloved goats suffering is worse. They're such a part of my life and they're so expressive that it grieves me so. PLEASE HELP THEM LORD!

Well, Jacob just called and said that he's by the bridge on the Braddock road so somebody needs to go and pick him up. If Cora is still spraying on the Sonic Bloom, I imagine that it'll be me. One bright thought this morning was when Cora asked, "So are you going to set up your massage table for your client, Mom?"

Can it be that I had forgotten about it? We had taken it down, as the only room big enough for it is in the living room, and we have a small living room. People were getting tired of going around it but today I have a paying client so she's going to get the ritz. :) I wonder if I remember how to set it up

Gotta go,

Dawn

Triplets

Cora was the heroine tonight at the supper table. She rescued 2 of my brand new, baby goats. My doe, Karen, had triplets this afternoon and almost lost 2 of them. One got pushed out the back door of the goat barn and was being pecked at by the chickens. ): The other one had fallen on it's neck when just born. Cora called me for that one. We milked the small amount of cholostrom that she had, after the other 2 drank, and stomach-tubed him with our make shift "Save a kid" syringe. He seemed pretty weak so I'm hoping that he'll pull through. Anyway, here are a couple of pictures of them--2 bucklings and 1 doeling. I wonder if she'll have enough milk for all 3? She should as she's a good-sized doe, but one never knows.

New Year's resolutions

How can it be that January is almost over and I haven't written to wish everyone a Happy New Year yet? First we had the flue; then we were dealing with sick calves because of the temperature fluctuations; and now we're trying to hit the books more seriously. We've set Andrew's graduation date for June 8th, so that is incentive to get moving big time. Then too, we always have the milking to contend with.

We had a surprise right before the new year started. It wasn't really a surprise because we kind of had our suspicions, but we were guaranteed, "Almost 100%" that the last 3 goats we bought were not bred. This is a picture of Jed Clamp-it which proves one must be 100% positive of such things when you live in ND. The mother had triplets, 2 of which froze. We took Jed into the house and he lived in the kitchen for 2 weeks. After that we could leave him with his mama during the days. Now at night we put him, and the other kid we inherited out of the deal, in a dog kennel in the milk room so the house is quiet again and smells a lot better too. Still, I miss my baby. Look at those wonderful Nubian ears!



I made 3 New Year's resolutions this year. The first may seem like one big DAH to you all, but it's been growing in my mind for awhile. You see, I've always had a heart of compassion for the underdogs of life. I absolutely cannot tolerate anyone being cruel to another person for any reason. Yet I have seen recently, that I have been terribly cruel to myself in many ways. I was abused as a child and I guess I thought that is how I should be treated. Although the years of recovery work have taught me to defend myself from the attacks of others, I couldn't see that I was more cruel to myself than anyone in my life now.
Last Fall I shared a very special day with some friends when the Lord showed me clearly how it hurt Him when I am cruel to myself. I had never thought of it like that before. I had never thought that God would be wounded by my self-abuse. It made me weap before His throne and , after I repented, my mind opened to the possibility that perhaps He wants me to be as kind to myself as I am to everybody else. I have been more observant of this now and have made it my resolution to treat myself as sweetly as I treat everybody else. This is resolution number 1 and it has led to much happiness in my life. :)
Resolution # 2 has to do with the farm. For a long time I've wanted to post a sort of diary about our farm activities. Years ago a friend told us that one of the biggest money makers for rural people to consider is offering city people a chance to come to the farm and see what it's really like to care for animals; to till the soil; and to produce your own food. Our friend had a travel-agent friend who was looking for farmers who would do this. The agency was charging each family member $1,000 a week to go out and work on the farms. We had pondered it at the time but decided not to get involved while our children were so young and impressionable. Still, just knowing that many city people would like to have contact with farmers has made me want to do something to help them.
I figured if I could write a journal of our activities, maybe folks could feel a little closer to the land. I wondered how to do this long before I started this blog and now I have the avenue here. I decided to track the life of this adorable little calf who is living in the barn right now. I will tell you about her, as we go along, and you can get a picture of how long it takes a critter to mature and how her personality develops. Oh yes, they all have their own personalities.
Actually we have 3 calves in the middle section of the barn which is considered the hospital.
The first is Mabel who almost died with something called nervous coccidiosis. She's big, weighing in at about 400 pounds and is looking like she may pull through. Secondly is Daisy who weighs about 250 pounds and was pulled off of a stock cow when she got sick with pneumonia. Lastly is this sweet little girl calf, called a heifer, who was born on a bitter cold night not long ago. When choosing her name, I considered my favorite flower bed blossoms--Shasta daisies. So her name is Shasta and she is a heart-breaker. I will post her picture soon and I will tell you about her antics so that you too can fall in love with this little princess.
So my second new year's resolution is to keep you folks up-to-date about farm life by tracking
activities through Shasta's eyes. By focusing on one animal, it will be easier for me to keep up with this goal of sharing the country life with those who aren't so fortunate as to be living out here in the great outdoors.
My 3rd New Year's resolution has to do with this perfectionism that rules my life. I am a melancholy/sanguine cross disposition. The melancholy must have things perfect while the sanguine just wants to be with people. This has translated in my life to mean that I think I must be perfect when I am with people--and when I am not. That's a big part of the reason that I developed shingles on my brain in 2006. I think that I mentioned this tendency in my first post.
It's so hard for me to just sit down here and write without editing everything as I go along because wouldn't it be terrible if I were to misspell a word or leave out a comma or mix my tenses? That is probably why it's January 25th and I still haven't written to wish everyone all of God's best in the New Year. Cora helped me with this today though.
I told her that I AM GOING TO FINISH THIS WRITING TODAY!!!!!!!!!!! She said, "Mom, want a tip? If you would just feel free to sit down and just write a little post, instead of thinking that it has to be a book, perhaps you would be able to keep up with it better." DAH AGAIN!!!
But I have so much that I want to say and it has to be PERFECT!!!
So I'm going to combine all of these thoughts now and, when I do, I come up with this. I don't have to be perfect, because I'm not anyway, so I'll be kind to myself and just write a little bit as the inspiration comes up. If things aren't worded perfectly, please forgive me. This blog is supposed to be therapy for me and not just one more burden.
So there, I've fessed up and I feel better. Now that I've learned how to put pictures on, things should be more interesting for you.
The last thing that I want to talk about has to do with my newest attempts to get back to wellness. The Lord has led me to a program called THE MASTER CLEANSE. It's also been called the lemonade diet. I'm starting tomorrow and I would like all of your prayers to be strong in my convictions to stay on it for 10 days. Many people have found it to be the only way to get completely well after a major illness. You can get the details by goggling MASTER CLEANSE.
The author of the book I read recommended blogging during the 10 days to encourage others to pursue this detoxification process. And so I will share with you my experiences each day of the cleanse. Now that is my goal and perfection demands that I do it every day. However, I know now that it probably won't happen every day. So I shall be kind to myself and say that I will write when I can.
Thanks for all of your support and I covet your prayers as I continue my recovery from shingles on my brain.