Have I truly forgiven?

Cora is packing up their house in preparation to move to MN.  The guys are in their Spring rush at the plant and out on the farms.  My lilies are popping up so I can no longer deny that Winter is over.  Can you believe that I would NOT be welcoming Spring this year.

Well it has to do with the fact that Michael is taking his family into the wonderful life of a dairy farmer "In the Spring".  I started my married life that way and it is HELL!!!  You can't go anywhere because the cows must be milked twice a day 365 days a year. 

So, it's all been said over and over and even this could not make them change their minds. 

So what am I left with?

I've begged God to change their minds for over a year.  I've worn my close friends out by requesting them to pray also.  Those closest to me have talked to the young couple out of their concerns for me and my declining health PLUS a sincere concern for this special young family.

Still this is what they are choosing to do.............................................

So what I going to do with all of these frustrations?  What can I do?  I have done all that I could to help them know how much I love them.  Now I must find a way to show that I'll love them even  though they're doing something which seems oh so stupid!

The Lord gave me this to ponder on today.  It seems just the thing that I'm needing.  If I choose to be bitter the rest of my life, I drive myself AWAY FROM THE LORD!!!  WOW  That's the last thing that I need right now.  I mean, Heaven would sure be nice but what about if He insists that I keep staying here?

I share these thoughts with hopes that they may bless someone out there.  Let's run to Him together.  Perhaps He'll heal us in this way.

So sad,

Dawn

PS  Check out the author's name.  I'd call that a God thing!

"Choose Intimacy Over Bitterness"
Dawn Hill, Bristol, VA

 

Out of my thirty-nine years in this fleshly tent on planet Earth, eighteen of those years have been spent pursuing the Lord and knowing Him more. Jesus Christ found me at twenty one years old because I was lost. Over the years, I have suffered my fair share of personal blows and heartaches, both before and after being born again, but we are told that we will face trials and tribulations, but to take heart because Jesus has overcome the world.

 

In the past four years God has been teaching me more and more how to draw closer to Him, even when it seems easier to retreat in times of personal warfare. I can remember in 2015 standing in my garage and crying out to the Lord during a very dark time. Seasons and situations come like this and instead of reacting, we, as the Bride of Christ, must learn to respond, and not only that, but we must run toward intimacy with Him and not toward vindication or the entangling web of bitterness.

 

You will find out where you are in your personal relationship with God by where you run when Hell rages and flesh manifests.

 

Do Not Be Intimate with Unforgiveness

 

One of the greatest genes of the Father that we must have ingrained in our spiritual DNA as sons of God, is forgiveness. We are repeatedly instructed to forgive and to not grow bitter. The Word of God tells us to not to sin in our anger (Ephesians 4:26). Forgiveness is freedom.

 

One thing I am learning in my walk with the Lord is that I cannot afford to be intimate with unforgiveness. It is a redirection of affection that should be surrendered to God. Intimacy with Christ is not simply in the times when all is well. It is also in the times when you have to speak by faith, "It is well."

 

 Even if through tears you must say, "It is well," then do it. Refuse to curse and refuse to water unforgiveness. It is quite easy to give ourselves over to soulish reactions because it is intoxicating to our soul. It is a massive, spiritual fertilizer that will allow a bitter root to grow while causing the field to stink. When you go from glory to glory, you are being transformed to emanate His nature more and more.

 

I know that this is not a flashy message, but it is a prophetic word for the Body of Christ at large. This is part of the Good News. Jesus has given us a new covenant and part of the covenant calls us higher into His ways.

 

 Intimacy is the high call and in order to demonstrate true and pure intimacy with Him, we live out what we have heard in the secret place. Are you hearing retribution in the secret place? Are you hearing retaliation in the secret place? In all humility, I pose this statement: Things like this are not found in the secret place. In the secret places of our hearts, only the light of Christ must be to illuminate and push back darkness so that healing can come.

 

The Answer by His Word and Spirit

 

One morning fairly recently, the Holy Spirit directed me to read Matthew 18 in its entirety. As I read this chapter, I noticed that it went from demonstrating humility as a child to dealing with sin and forgiveness in the Kingdom of God. After reading the chapter, I knew that God was wanting to do surgery on His people, myself included.

 

Years ago, I had to make a decision to forgive one of my close family members for some rejection I experienced from them. The Lord reminded me, in a time when that rejection was made publicly evident, to bless and to not curse, and to pray for those who would mistreat. He reminded me to forgive and to move forward.

 

As I personally go through seasons that would be better with a convenient fast forward button, there are lessons in the difficult times. The lessons come in the growth of asking God to examine my heart and to bend me to His ways. The relationship grows when we run to Him and not away from Him.

 

When you are truly intimate with God, things are exposed that need exposing. In those moments, areas of brokenness are made whole and pruning can come forth. We must allow God to not only cut the branch of bitterness if it is there, but to strip it out at the root. Let's yield to the digging up of even a seed of resentment because, if that seed takes root, resentment begins to grow within us.

 

Beloved, run to the Bridegroom in every season. Let the weight of glorious intimacy with Him mark you. I believe that part of the cleansing needed in the Body of Christ is a deluge of forgiveness of others and of self. Along with that will come confessing our sins, one to another, and demonstrating real love which can only come from the Father.

 

If you have battled in this time, forgive and recognize who the real enemy is around you. We must resist the desire to echo how the world handles relational issues. Forgive others, regardless if you ever hear "I'm sorry" from that person. Move forward and embrace the Lord's holy nature. He is the greatest refuge you will ever know, and knowing Him requires forgiveness.

 

Dawn Hill
Lovesick Scribe 

Email: click here

Website: www.lovesickscribe.com

Dawn Hill is a writer and blogger also known as the Lovesick Scribe. The inspiration behind Lovesick Scribe came about a few years ago when she started keeping a journal, following a powerful encounter with God's presence. Since that time, she has faithfully kept her journal and ministered at times on things that the Lord has given her to release or to meditate upon. Dawn is a wife, a mother, a prophetic voice, and above all else, a lover of His presence. She desires to stir up passion on the inside of you to glorify the Lord, to fall in love with Him, and to hear His voice for yourself. Dawn Hill's heart aches for His presence, and she desires to share His heartbeat with you so that your heart can sync its rhythm with His.

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